Thank F**k it's February

When I say that I am so glad January is over - I really, really mean it. Like really. Because this January, ladies and gentlemen, I somehow managed to survive a full 31 days without eating a single piece of chocolate. Not a chocolate chip cookie, not a powdered hot chocolate, not even the single smartie that fell out of my drawer and rolled, teasingly, around my bedroom floor. I repeat - no chocolate whatsoever. And that's not even the impressive part, oooh no. I managed to do this...

a) without killing anyone
b) with my sanity vaguely (...) intact
c) without substituting chocolate with wine.

Okay so that last one was a lie. But c'mon, small mercies. Anyone that knows me will know that I eat chocolate every single day so - petty as it may seem to you - this is a pretty fecking big deal for me: the lady who once managed to eat an entire family sized bar of Cadbury's BEFORE 9AM. 


In addition to severe chocolate avoidance, this month I have spent: a lot of time eating breakfast in bed on Saturdays: a lot of time panicking that signing up to Tough Mudder 2017 when I can't do a single press up was a very bad idea, a little bit of time planning how to decorate my BRAND NEW BEDROOM (thanks bro for finally movin' on out) and finally, this month I have spent literally zero time whatosever wasting my infinite amount of fucks on people/ things/ situations that simply do not deserves my fucks. So here's to a fuckfree 2017. (If you don't own this book already, I seriously suggest you buy it. Your life might depend on it). 

I hope your January was the tits. What did you get up to!? 

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